my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
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