just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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