Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Its about making memories worth repressing
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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