If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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