i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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