Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize