i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Randomize
