If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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