I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
