Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize
