The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
