i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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