Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
