i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize