her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Pants are for mortals
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
