Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
