why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
