Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize