The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
