ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
