Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
