Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
