are you still at the devil's house?
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
