Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
