You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
