so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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