I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
