we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Randomize
