Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
