He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
you told grandpa to call you daddy
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
