i just wanna soil my oats bro
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
