i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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