So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
