I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
