I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
