Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
