I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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