Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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