y did u give ur computer a hand job?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
