i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Randomize
