Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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