When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize