Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.

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(516): View more from New York

you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex

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(718): View more from New York

Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.

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(716): View more from New York

It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.

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(518): View more from New York

I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.

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(914): View more from New York

Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.

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(807): View more from Ontario

I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?

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(541): View more from Oregon

I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.

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