wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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