I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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