Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
