We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
