Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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