Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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