i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Randomize
