Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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