I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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